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Personal Bullying Stories, Part 2

 

Screen shot 2014-02-03 at 5.40.47 PMThanks to all who have shared their personal bullying stories with us. We’re grateful for your contributions and hope that your sharing makes a difference in the lives of others. 

Joanne, Age 43

“Pink Shirt Day is a day that I will always promote, and I am so glad that over the last few years bullying has been brought to light so that we can do something about it. I am 43 years old but have next to nothing for happy memories from school. My memories consist of being taunted and teased, called every name in the book because I was overweight…I wasn’t like everyone else. I had no groups to hang out with, no boyfriends that I could be proud of to hold hands with, It was just me. I would walk the halls at school to get to my next class, or go to the bathroom only to be called names again or hear ” did you feel that earthquake?” as I walked by the bullies hearing their laughter behind me. My bullying went on all through elementary school, to junior high and even to senior high. Even my own neighbourhood wasn’t safe from the name-calling. At school it was mainly the same 2 guys, but when those guys were in their groups it got worse.

So what do I remember from my school years? Crying…a lot. Lunch hours, recess, were spent mostly hiding in empty classrooms or corners of the library where no one could find me to hurt me. Years later, one of those guys found me and messaged me through Facebook and apologized. He said he knew what they did all those years was wrong and that he was sorry. Just knowing that he acknowledged what they did to me all those years, surprised me. I was grateful for the apology but even though I can forgive him for what they did, those memories, those scars will remain with me the rest of my life. Bullying has to stop, I don’t want to see kids growing up into adults with the same memories of school that I do. Just because someone is different, doesn’t mean they don’t have feelings, like they don’t feel hurt like everybody else…let’s end bullying once and for all.”

Anonymous

“When I was a kid my only friends were boys, I wasn’t the typical little girl who liked to play doll or things like that. Many laughed at me because of it, saying I wasn’t a “real girl” that I had to be a boy, that my parents were wrong about my identity. But I had friends who liked me so I didn’t pay attention what they were saying about me. All that changed when I was 10. I don’t really know what happened, but even boys didn’t want to be near me. I spent the whole year alone. They weren’t really laughing at me, they were just avoiding me, staying away from me. It wasn’t a good year for me, I also have had to face personal problems, I did it on my own.

We all changed school the next year and I found some new friends but somehow people found something else about me. They were always asking me questions like “Why don’t you have a dad?”, “Did he left because you did something?”, “What did you do to him?”,” He didn’t love you enough to stay”, “You didn’t love him so he left”, “You made him leave and now you’re sad because you don’t have a dad like us”. It wasn’t just painful. At that time I thought it was true. I didn’t deal with it or run to a teacher, I did like always, just kept things inside and ignore everyone.

Thankfully it all stopped when I entered in high school, I suppose people were mature enough to understand me a bit or to realize they were wrong. I still had a few people laughing at me but I also had great friends who defended me, they were good to me.

I regret one thing though, maybe if I had talked about it earlier I wouldn’t have had to face bullies for so long. Maybe if I hadn’t been so ashamed, maybe if I had talked someone would have done something and the bullies would have stopped and I would have been the last one, I know I wasn’t the only one but I guess they were too afraid to talk. Don’t be afraid to talk about it, we can’t fix everything by ourselves.”

To submit your own personal bullying story, click here. 

 

One Response to “Personal Bullying Stories, Part 2”

  1. My story about bullying began at age 11 when I was diagnosed with limb-girdle muscular dystrophy. By the age 12, my shoulder, hip and leg muscles had weakened.. I had an unusual waddling gate that is identifiable in children living with MD. Children would tease and ridicule my awkward walk. They would say things like “walk much” and “I hear you will be confined to a wheelchair and die by the time you reach your early 20’s.”

    These comments hurt and scared me to death! Kids can be so cruel to those of us living with a physical disability. The teasing and awkward stares continued throughout high school. Even though my self esteem suffered, I out wit and out smart these bullies. I was feisty and spoke my mind on many occasions. I attended many school dances but the boys never asked me to dance. I was the cute disabled girl who never got asked to the prom.

    University was a different story. Roommates, fellow classmates and young men were more receptive. They appreciated my spunk and sense of humour. During university, I used an electric scooter to get to classes since the campus was so large. This was the first time in my life I had to use an assistive device. It took over two months to hold my head upright. No one should ever feel embarrassed about a condition you have no control of. I loved attending university and the social events, but it was not easy living with a disability and being different than others.

    My twenties and thirties were filled with ups and downs. Having 6 years of post secondary education, did not make it any easier to find employment. Companies were hesitant to hire. I knew within seconds, as I drove my wheelchair into the interview whether I would be hired, just by the look on the interviewers faces. During the past 10 years, I have been bullied by 2 supervisors at different places of employment, suffered extreme mental stress and fired for no apparent reason. At my current place of employment, a fellow co-worker uses intimidating behaviour, spreadis rumours and verbal abuse to bully me. As a disabled worker, I represent a vulnerable demograMy story about bullying began at age 11 when I was diagnosed with limb-girdle muscular dystrophy. By the age 12, my shoulder, hip and leg muscles had weakened.. I had an unusual waddling gate that is identifiable in children living with MD. Children would tease and ridicule my awkward walk. They would say things like “walk much” and “I hear you will be confined to a wheelchair and die by the time you reach your early 20’s.”

    These comments hurt and scared me to death! Kids can be so cruel to those of us living with a physical disability. The teasing and awkward stares continued throughout high school. Even though my self esteem suffered, I out wit and out smart these bullies. I was feisty and spoke my mind on many occasions. I attended many school dances but the boys never asked me to dance. I was the cute disabled girl who never got asked to the prom.

    University was a different story. Roommates, fellow classmates and young men were more receptive. They appreciated my spunk and sense of humour. During university, I used an electric scooter to get to classes since the campus was so large. This was the first time in my life I had to use an assistive device. It took over two months to hold my head upright. No one should ever feel embarrassed about a condition you have no control of. I loved attending university and the social events, but it was not easy living with a disability and being different than others. I am living proof that adversity builds character. A bully tries to control to cover up their own insecurities and inadequacies.

    My twenties and thirties were filled with ups and downs. Having 6 years of post secondary education, did not make it any easier to find employment. Companies were hesitant to hire. I knew within seconds, as I drove my wheelchair into the interview whether I would be hired, just by the look on the interviewers faces. During the past 10 years, I have been bullied by 2 supervisors at different places of employment, suffered extreme mental stress and fired for no apparent reason. At my current place of employment, a fellow co-worker uses intimidating behaviour, spreads rumours and verbal abuse to bully me. As a disabled worker, I represent a vulnerable demographic. It takes a tenacious employer to hire a disabled employee. For this reason alone, I am grateful. As an intelligent qualified employee, I deserve the same mutual respect as any other non disabled coworker. If you witness bullying and do nothing about it, you are just as guilty as the bully. Bullying needs to be reported and those responsible be held accountable for their actions.

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